Greetings!   Tonight is Time Out New York’s annual Eat Out Awards and you’ve just gotten front-row seats to one of New York City’s primo culinary happenings. Okay, not literally, but The Feed will be live-blogging the event for your pleasure at (Le) Poisson Rouge. While you vegetate at home in your puffy slippers, we will courageously sit in the front row for you, throwing all caution to the wind, furiously typing our little fingers off, bringing you play-by-play coverage of who went home with a coveted Eat Out Awards plate and who, alas, did not.

Everything will be in real-time, so forgive any minor typos or grammatical hiccups. Of course, we promise that any wardrobe malfunctions will be documented in their shocking entirety! Our coverage will be soup-to-nuts, as it were, including every pick by our esteemed and devilish staff, as well as those by our dear (and opinionated) readers. The mustachioed Mike Rucker and the glamorous Gabriella Gershenson, Eat Out editor, will be emceeing the event and trying to contain the inevitable giddy pandemonium.

Did someone say cocktails?   Your trusted correspondent would like to pause now for station inebriation. We’ll be, um, right back. Barkeep!

It never hurts to get a crowd liquored up, and the Eat Out Awards are no exception. Polish vodka Ozel was splashed into martinis, and cocktails like the Grapefruit Burst, with grapefruit and lime juices, simple syrup and elderflower liqueur. Those trying to maintain a slight degree of sobriety are sipping Maximo Tempranillo, a feisty Spanish red, and the reliable Stella Artois beer. The room is crowding up, the lighting is dim, and the music is throbbing. I’ll be surprised if an orgy doesn’t break out, though I’m not dressed for one.

Chanteuse Lady Rizo is seducing the crowd with retro tunes replete with double entendres. Lordy, lordy! Is she undressing? Just a bit. Man, it's getting hot in here. Is that a bustier? My, oh my.

Gabriella and Mike are making their way to the stage. My heart is pounding. The hour of truth is upon us! Expectations, hopes and dreams are in jeopardy. The first half of the awards, a.k.a. “Critics’ picks,” were selected by the Eat Out staff, and while in good fun, they actually document some of this year’s most important trends. I'm not kidding. It's really about to start. Under pain of death, do not leave your computer!  

It's really happening. Momofuku phenom David Chang is in the house, as is Julie Reiner of Clover Club. Chef Paul Liebrandt is on his cell phone! Chef Michael "Bao" Huynh and wife/chef Thao Nguyen are looking smashing together. Chef Marlo Scott is bopping around. The Char No. 4 team definitely know how to get their drink on!  


 

Now the fun begins. Susur Lee of Shang, a Toronto transplant who defies classification, has grabbed the award for the “Best chef without boundaries.”

Park Slope’s Beer Table, which has been effectively sabotaging the neighborhood’s Abs of Steel with its superior brews, can now crow it’s the “Best place to cultivate a beer belly.”

Japanophiles will not be surprised to learn that Ippudo NY has walked off with the “Best justification for the ramen craze” award, given its ethereal fresh-made noodles and sublime tonkotsu stock.

Bespoke Chocolates has won “Best sweet revenge” thanks to chocolatier Rachel Zoe Insler’s addictively good, pretzel-covered, sea-salted caramels and her realm of other handmade sweets.