COVERITLIVE.COM

11:31

MissConduct - Hello, everyone! It's Robin, and I'll be online at noon to answer, analyze, and address all your social questions. You can start sending questions and comments in now, if you like, and I'll see you soon!

11:59

MissConduct - And it's noon and ... it's silent. Where is everyone?

12:00

[Comment From megan]
should i say "bless you" to a sneezing atheist?

12:01

MissConduct - Sure, you're not saying who is blessing them. Or you could say "gesundheit." Have you been seeing the book ads?

12:01

MissConduct - I find it funny that this is the quesion I am most known for.

12:01

MissConduct - I should get the domain sneezingatheist.com.

12:02

[Comment From Guest]
I am wondering if there is new etiquette/protocol for baby showers or maybe I'm just a bit old-fashioned. I could even be out of touch...who knows!! I received a baby shower invite for my cousin's 2nd baby. A shower was held for her first baby 2 1/2 years ago and now she's pregnant with her second baby from a second guy (not married to the first or this one - which I guess isn't relevant). The invite stated the shower was being given by 3 friends "with the help of (the paternal grandmother). Here's question #1: Is it appropriate to rsvp to the mother or father of the baby. Question #2: Is it now appropriate on the invitation to state that (in addition to your gift), attending guests bring a box of diapers or baby wipes AND the gift receipt for your gift.

12:03

MissConduct - 1. RSVPs can be collected by whoever is free to do it. 2. That level of specificity is a bit over the top. You can go along with it or not, of course; these things are always to be regarded as suggestions only.

12:04

[Comment From Anonymous]
My boss was recently terminated but I want to maintain a relationship with them - what is the best way for me to address them? Should I email or call? And what should I say?

12:05

MissConduct - Use whatever mode of communication you normally do, offer your condolences, and ask to keep in touch. If you're on LinkedIn or another career networking site, ask if you can connect through that. I'm sure your boss will be glad to keep in touch. You never know where a good lead might come from.

12:05

[Comment From Guest]
Showers exist specifically to be gift-giving parties, so specifications about the gifts for a shower would never bother me. And frankly, the idea is to be useful to the new parents and baby -- and five car seats or 50 onesies would not be. Gift receipts seem practical.

12:06

MissConduct - I think requesting receipts is a little tacky (although people should include them anyway). Suggestions don't bother me, either; since I don't have kids, I'm really not up on what gear is the best so I like having a guide.

12:06

[Comment From Lisa]
Is it a bit over the top to have a second baby shower? I thought these were designed to help new mommies. Of course it is always nice to celebrate.

12:07

MissConduct - Right, you normally wouldn't in that situation (only 2-3 years apart).

12:07

[Comment From Moms daughter]
Hi Robin, my mom passed away last week. Many of my co-workers sent me condolence cards, and now that I'm back at work, I'm thanking them as I run into them. I assume I don't need to write them back, but what about those I don't run into in a reasonable amount of time -- is it OK to send email thanks?

12:08

MissConduct - If someone sent a card with a personal note, you ought to write them back. Otherwise, a call or e-mail is fine for a more casual "off the rack" card.

12:08

[Comment From Rose]
A woman at work is a sweet, if completely useless, coworker. However, she doesn't seem to understand that while I am the age of her daughter, I seem to be much more capable, and she treats me like a child. This irks to no end, because while I'm young and relatively new, she is not my mother and she should not treat me like she is. Any way I can say this without offending her too much?

12:10

MissConduct - When you're working to resolve conflicts with other people, you need to be as objective as possible about their behavior. "Stop acting like my mother" is pretty much the opposite of an objective statement. Figure out specifically what actions this woman is doing that bother you, ask yourself if they are really worth getting bothered about (they might be, but they might be behaviors that only irk you because they remind you of your mother), and then open up a calm discussion with your co-worker (in which you are willing to make some changes, too).

12:11

[Comment From Guest]
I think it's tacky to send thank you emails, espcially if friends or family your responding to send you a card. Take the time a hand write a thank you message

12:11

[Comment From Sarah B]
On the flip side, when I offer condolences (or just cards of support in general), I usually preface it with a "No need to reply--I know this is a busy time for you. Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you". I like letting people off the hook, since writing thankyou notes is probably not something a grieving person really has time for.

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